Welcome to the Celestial Escalator, non-stop moving stairway to paradise. Unfortunately it isn't working. An ingratiating series of posters on the way up inform you that 93,000,000,000 souls use the escalator every year, that it was installed over seventeen millenia ago, and that whilst every effort is being made to recify the fault, budgetary constraints mean that it will be at least one hundred thousand years before it is working again. When finally you reach the top you discover that paradise is a small white room filled with smoke. Some bright spark has obviously decided that a smoke machine would be just the thing to provide heaven with much needed ambiance. 'Somebody open a window!' you yell. Fortunately somebody does. When the smoke clears the word 'Reception' becomes visible across the room. 'Good evening Sir/Madam,' says the angel at the reception desk. 'Please take a seat. Somebody will be along to fit you with wings shortly.' Click here.